Day 58 & 59: IN-Sanity - You Won't Believe What Came Into The House This Weekend.

Oh dear... possibly a tsunami level of inward flow at the Jackson house.
 

You Won't Believe What Came Into The House This Weekend

I enjoyed a lazy morning in bed reading a book... actually, I read through to 1pm and then had a little sleep. Loved it! Meanwhile hubby went off to enjoy his passion at the local DVD store which was closing down... sign of the times hey? It was an opportunity for him to pick up some classics missing from his collection. INCOMING WARNING!!
 

I didn't realise what this meant until I saw the pile. 36 DVDs made there way into the house. Oh boy!! It started a conversation about moving all the DVDs to an online medium. This would enable us to get ALL the DVDs out of the house. Jerry was saying this was not as easy as it sounds. Time to research me thinks.
 
In the mean time we may have come up with an interim solution. The issue with the amount of DVDs we have is the space they take up. We have a little home and 300+ DVDs take up quite a lot of space. It may be more than this... have to count them.
 
The solution we are going to try is to put each DVD in a sleeve and keep the cover art with the sleeve. We will convert a drawers into a DVD storage system like they do at the DVD stores. It will take up so much less space. Don't know exactly how this will work however the end result will be the bulky plastic cases will be gone-ski . One option is something called Discsox. It appears they are high quality sleeves just for this purpose. I will let you know how we go.

This will enable us to take the (somewhat ugly) cabinet out of the lounge room. This will clear the space in readiness for the lounge room makeover we have planned. 

 

What came in - 36 

36 DVDs - classics 
 

What went out - 1 items

1 top I don't wear

INSIGHTS

(1) Finding a solution to the things you cherish is fun to do
(2) Piracy creates the need to protect from theft yet hampers all users making copies of items they have purchased. A strange industry.   

TOTAL: OUT - 797  IN - 112

TOTAL CASH sales from gone-ski items = $48

Day 56 & 57: Why Device Distraction Disorder Feels So Good

A quick one today... nothing really to report.

Device Distraction Disorder

I coined this phrase at work when holding meetings and watching people on their devices. I call attention to it as I point to my laptop, my personal iPhone 5 and my work iPhone 6 plus. We all laugh, but the truth is this distraction is disconnecting us from being present.

Distractions are a way to escape the discomforts of life. TV, alcohol, social media etc are all obvious ones. Being aware is the key. Like anything we do in life, awareness helps us navigate with intention.

Which brings me to todays 'Hans Christian Anderson' moment. Where does all the old tech go? In a box in our cupboard of course! You know the box. The one with the cords, old iPhones, broken (just in case) ear-buds, storage devices no one has readers for, floppy discs (no, really?!), and other stuff we don't know what it's used for. Have you got one of those?

Any-who... (change of subject)  

The last two nights have been social nights out for us. We loved it. Dinner with great friends, a farewell to a colleague after work and staying in the city overnight results in no gone-ski items for two days. Does this bother me... nah!

We will get back to it.

Have a brilliant day
Cheers from Deb (tired and looking forward to a sleep in)

What went out - 0 items

Zip (a-dee-do-dah)

What came in - 0 items

Naught (ty)

INSIGHTS

(1) No matter how committed you are, a night with friends, good food, fine wine and a sleep over cannot be overlooked as a spectacular excuse not to gone-ski items.
(2) Note to self... SLEEP IN TOMRROW!!

 

TOTAL: OUT - 796  IN - 76

TOTAL CASH sales from gone-ski items = $48

Day 54: SPACE, The Final Frontier

It only takes 5 minutes a day to get into the habit of clearing out the clutter.

Clearing out is the easy part

Stopping the incoming items is the hardest part. The idiom 'nature abhors a vacuum' explains the tension 'naturally' generated when we deem a space empty. It is about redefining the space.

Is it empty or is it open and clear? What does a clear, clean space mean to you? How does it feel? Where will you put the time you used to invest in moving, cleaning and dealing with the clutter? What passion have you got inside your heart that now can be explored?

A reduction of items coming in has meant a big difference to us. We use our time differently. We use our space differently. We appreciate our things so much more.

This journey is changing our lives in a lovely, slow and permanent way.

Have you been inspired? Share your experience here (my blog's facebook group)https://www.facebook.com/groups/427233054096059/

Cheers from Deb (soaking in gratitude)

What went out - 7 items

One pair of shoes and 6 pieces of clothing from Jerry's wardrobe (his choices)

What came in - 0 items

Nothing again...loving this.

INSIGHTS

(1) The definition of clear space impacts how you use it
(2) Stuff has no value what so ever. The way we use stuff makes it valuable.

TOTAL: OUT - 792  IN - 76

TOTAL CASH sales from gone-ski items = $48

Day 33: One Decision Saved over $1000 this Month

There is no way I would have realised how much this ghastly consumerism costs me without looking at the numbers. 

We reduced our impulse spends by 85% and saved over $1000. We Rock!

What do our bank accounts tell me?

We looked at our bank accounts from last year and the impulse buys stood out like big hot steaming turds. It was sickening to see how many things we bought from impulse....we were the marketers dream couple. Drawn in by the shiny, sparkling signs and juiced up by the 'bargains' we found.

It's a scam people!! 

Browsing our bank accounts showed that most of the non-necessity spending was impulse buys. 

We both had colluded on this unconscious way of living...and we are darn glad it has stopped!! 

Here are the impulse spends that jumped off the bank statements:

• dinners out (always impulsive, never planned)
• clothes shopping (never planned)
• op shopping (no predetermine plan to buy)
• DVDs (no real plan to buy until we passed the store)
• Nights out after work (mostly alcohol costs)

In January 2014 we spent $1195 on impulse consumerism!! How stupid is that?

This year we spent only $185 with two dinners, one night after work, 2 DVDs and a quick bite before the movies being all we spent. Although these have been considered impulse buys, all but the DVDs were discussed well before the decision was made to spend.

Being in the business improvement industry, I love data. The numbers tell you the truth. The data tells me that things are shifting big time for our family and it is all because we made a decision....here it is. 

DECISION: To let go of the false relationship and compulsive need (addiction) from the consumer culture I have happily, if unconsciously colluded with. To experience myself, others and life via a relationship built on connection, creating and discovery.

This decision has changed our lives!

What went out - 2 items

Two more coats left the building. One watermelon coat I have only worn once and one 1960 coat I have worn twice. Both really nice....but no longer considered part of the family.

What came in - 0 items

It is wonderful to have nothing coming in
 

INSIGHTS

(1) Ignorance may be bliss, but consciousness is empowering
(2) I have gained so much more than money from this shift
 

TOTAL: OUT - 627   IN - 49

Day 29: Empty Boxes, Empty Life

I was wandering around the house trying to find the next place of focus. I looked up above the pantry in the kitchen....BAM!!

How long have you been there hidden in plain sight? LOL

There were 4 empty wine and beer glass boxes. Now I could argue that I may need them one day to pack up and move, or take them on a picnic, or some other reason to keep them. But the honest truth is, I may never use those boxes again... and all they will ever do is sit there and take up space and create an eyesore. Gone-ski!!

So is keeping the boxes about saving? Saving waste, saving the environment by preventing having to buy another one, saving time by having it available now etc.

Where is the line between useful saving and hoarding where the cost of keeping outweighs the value of letting go?

This is a trap for us all in one way or another. Hoarding (I believe) is the 'need' to keep...just in case. Our 'just in case' reasons are unique to us.

Here's a question:

Does this item constrain me, prevent my freedom, invade our space, take time but give little back, demand energy or distract me from my passions? 
or
Does this item expand me, enable my freedom, add to my passion, bring joy to our space, enable a better future, inspire us etc?


It's interesting that is happening at this time of life as I watch my parents having to consider down-sizing. What do they do with all the 'stuff' they have accumulated?

Interesting!

What went out - 4 items

4 wine glass boxes. Aren't they funny things to keep.

What came in - 0 items

Doing great on this now.

INSIGHTS

(1) There are things that have been there all along that I cannot see (as in life)
(2) I don't really NEED much

TOTAL: OUT - 609   IN - 48

Day 22: Doing it Together is WAY More Fun!!

It is getting easier. I wonder how easy it will be on day 365? Will we still have things we can get rid of or will we be sitting on a milk crate, eating apples and singing 'WTF did we do that for'?

Who knows. I think there are so many things we really don't need or even want, that we could go for two years without blinking. Scary really!

 

Candles, Nic Naks and um...er... no thanks

It was fun going through the glasses/candle cabinet. We had a few candle holders that just were not us. They sit there  hidden amongst there friends, without ever being noticed. The quiet ones that sit at the back of the room.

Well today they are celebrated and set free. Someone else will love them and they won't feel ignored as they have done here at our place.

What went out - 10 items

A mix of candle holders, candles (scented... not a fan of scented candles) and a couple of nic naks)

What came in - 0 items

We are aware of how much lighter we feel because the 'flow in' has all but stopped.

INSIGHTS

(1) Doing it together is way more fun!
(2) Only keep what you really love. Once a gift is given to you, you can do with it what you want. Re-gift or donate it so it can find it's rightful owner.


TOTAL: OUT - 429   IN - 29

Day 19: Dinner Out Disaster

A sure recipe for consumerism is living an unbalanced life. Getting up at 2:45 am because we couldn't sleep made for a long day. Add to that a busy schedule, a pile of washing up on the sink and the desire to have an early night led us to a decision to go out for dinner. 

Impulsive? I am thinking, yes! 

The reason I know this is because of how I felt on the way home afterwards. As we jumped in the car to go home I asked Jerry "how much was dinner?" He replied "sixty dollars". WHAT!?! I was shocked. A small starter, 3 dishes, and an orange juice. Add to that the bottle of wine we bought on the way and you have a $70 impulse buy. 

Did we 'need' to go? Did we 'have' to go? Or did we plain and simply 'want' to go? 

This decision was made unconsciously and was based on circumstances. Living life in reaction to circumstance has cost us in more ways than expected. We stuffed up! And we both colluded in this decision beautifully.  

It is not only the $70 but it is the realisation of the many, many times we have done this without even thinking, without ever considering the impact of the expenditure. 

I put this down to a lesson learnt. For me, 2015 is the year for conscious choices around consumerism. My reaction to this impulsive choice is insightful. I could easily rationalise it but I would be bullshitting me and bullshitting you. This is a 'no bullshit' blog and so let's suck it up and own it... and learn from it. 

Awareness is a grand thing. It is through awareness that great change occurs. There are two ways to go with this: (1) to feel shame and guilt or (2) to own it without judgement and learn from it. I don't really do the shame thing...and so owning it without judgement, is the way to go. 

What went out - 2 items

Two pairs of jeans from Miss Sammi's room (will put in clothes offerings for friends kids)

What came in - 0 items

Nothing came in. I have noticed I have no desire to go to the shops. Big change. 

INSIGHTS

(1) Collusion makes poor choices, easy!
(2) A clean kitchen is more important than you think. Not dealing with the basics, not completing on responsibilities and letting things slide, adds up. Eventually something will give. It takes commitment to the 'not so fun' jobs that enables greater enjoyment and freedom in other areas.   


TOTAL: OUT - 409   IN - 28

  

Day 8: Establishing the Gone-ski Process

It appears easy, sixteen items out and zero in. Simple, but not so easy. Where are the sixteen items going?

To be able to really play this game well you have to establish a way to get the things OUT of your life!! This is what I call the 'gone-ski process'. And of course it is worth considering not wasting things of value.

To be able to continue the flow out of our lives we have established 4 baskets:
(1) DONATE: for items going to the op shop 
(2) SELL: for items too good to give away that can go to friends, be re-gifted or sell 
(3) TRASH: gets thrown away
(4) REPAIR: for items needing repair (anything staying in this basket too long gets trashed

We have used existing baskets we had in various cabinets around the house. In essence we have recycled their use and in the process emptied the crap out of them. We have put the baskets in a really easy to get to place. This keeps it real.  

Without this distribution process I think I may have piles of stuff lying around eventually causing more clutter. This way there is a clear place to put things and a method to redistribute OUT of the house.

 

 

What can happen when you have a quiet day at home

I did a bit of a clean up at home and found 12 items for the gone-ski baskets. Sammi joined me at around 1pm and we decided it would be fun to play Boggle. We had a blast and she learned a few words.

When putting it away we noticed a cane basket in the TV cabinet which has been untouched for around 3 years. We laughed and laughed at the things Sammi kept squirrelled away in there. All 104 things in that basket were set free and put in the gone-ski baskets. Most went to the trash.

What went out - 115 items

Mostly little plastic toys, used craft items and a few tops, old wooden cupboard drawers (don't even ask me why I have them...LOL) and a few items from the kitchen we just never use. 

 

What came in - 0 items

Even though I went to the shops, nothing other than the items on my very small food shopping list came home. I was just so darn pleased with myself as I drove out of the shopping centre that I had not been drawn into the consumer prison I had built myself.   

 

INSIGHTS

(1) Recognise every success, whether small or large, as this creates momentum.
(2) Observe self and others without judgement. Any judgement is a reflection of a personal belief inside myself and has nothing to do with anyone else.   

 

TOTAL: OUT - 289   IN - 4

Day 5: A Chardy in a Cardie

We decided to go to the movies... something we don’t do enough especially this is Jerry’s craft and passion, It is almost criminal that we don’t go more regularly to see something new and inspiring.

Anyway we both wanted to see Interstellar. The only session remaining was tonight at 6pm in the city, so we decided to go. On our way there we looked for food prior to the movie. We ordered a small meal and a glass of wine each. Seems innocent right?

 

It was scary how quickly I answered Jerry when he said “want a wine?”. Before my ‘I’m cutting back, good angel’ stepped in my ‘bring it on!!, seriously saucy, bad deb’ said “you bet, I’ll have a chardy”. Well, $40 later and not yet at the movies I realised how out of alignment this was. Brilliant! Note to self… WTF!!! Time to develop some personal principles. More on that later.

 

Wish-List to hold back the impulse buying

We spoke about the wish-list idea (guest blog coming very soon) and decided to explore it in its full glory. On the way home on the train I sat down and started creating my wish-list. How bazaar, I had trouble thinking of things I needed, wanted or would love to experience. I came up with a few things but in essence there was not much I yearned for….but get me in the shops and I can drain an account in no time. Crazy!

 

What went out - 4 items

Only a quick cull tonight as I needed to go to bed for an early start. So we hit the DVD cabinet and took out a few more we will not watch again.

What came in – 0 items

Again nothing. I wonder how many days this will last.
 

Insights

(1)    We can be smarter with our eating out. Need to plan in advance and take food with us.
(2)    Wine is a real escape for me…and I really don’t choose to have it, I just do.

TOTAL: OUT - 158   IN - 0

Day 4: EnLISTing Our Friends

Interesting how supportive everyone is of this journey. And how open they are to understanding about all aspects. I wish I was as understanding. I am experiencing a whole host of emotions, I am embarrassed, shamed, relieved, joyous, still, in wonderment of the future and clear that the scam I have pulled on myself is no longer valid.



Sammi deciding it is time to participate

It is clear that everyone has value to add to this journey. One friend described her 'wish-list' concept they use to determine purchases. I loved it so much I asked her to write an article for this blog. Keep your eye out for this article...you will feel her heart in it...coming soon!

The big surprise of the day was Sammi (my daughter) asking me to help her clear out some stuff in her room. She wants to participate in this experience too. She wants to firstly go through her toys. Her decision criteria is: 

• KEEPING - heart felt toys with a deep meaning for her e.g. her special sleeping soft toy called Sheepie (BTW Sheepie is a pig... we laughed out loud when we wrote this).
• GONE-SKI - childish and things she doesn't use any more such as Barbies and little plastic models etc.

What went out - 110 items

9 CDs - In plain sight under the TV has been a cane box full of CDs. Most I have downloaded to my iTunes. They have become todays gone-ski target. It is time for some of them to go. Instead of going through ALL of them like a crazed banshee we just grabbed a handful and cleared out the ones we no longer need/want.  

101 Toys - (54 in the trash, 31 to the op shop, 14 to give to younger friends). It was magical moment watching Sammi going through 2 small boxes of toys in her shelves. We laughed at so many of the things she's kept over the years. Secretly I was in awe of her awakening this part of herself. She is amazing.

What came in - 0 items

What can I say... nothing has made it's way into our home yet. It has been 4 days and so far no desire to go to the shops.

Last minute 'oh no we have no milk!!!'...needed to go to the shops. So instead of the normal just go without conscious intent, we all sat down and put a list together of things we really need. The trip to the shops went like clockwork... we got home with only the items on the list... and didn't forget the milk!! LOL.  

There has been a shift.

 

What we wasted - nothing

It felt like there was going to be more food waste from the fridge however some friends dropped by and the old crappy carrots went home to their guinea pigs and the over-ripe bananas are soon to be muffins. Perfect! 

I also found myself cooking things from the fridge I would normally not reach for. So it appears I am now conscious of using the food we have rather than meeting my childlike needs....you know the ones "but I want it now...I don't want that, I want this!"
 

Insights

(1) There is nothing that needs to be wasted. All consumables can be used... if not I can learn not to buy them in future. 

(2) I am a role model for my daughter. She will learn how to 'be' from the actions I take. This journey is also 'giving' to her. 

 

TOTAL: OUT - 154   IN - 0

Day 3: A Waste of Thyme

Oh dear, I cleaned out the fridge after our Christmas and New Year feasting and found so many foods we need to throw out.

It has become apparent this consumer train I am driving includes the wasted foods we are not enjoying through our bodies. The more I explore this part of my life the more I realise how desensitised I have been to this self created unsustainable model.

On a lighter side, I commenced my journey to learn to play piano so I can write the music to some lyrics I wrote back in 2012. My 12 year old daughter (who plays) is teaching me. It was fun doing scales and learning to play children's songs.  

What went out - 2 items

Found a candle that is scented and will never be used by us. We love candles but prefer non scented ones. I think I will drop this at the op shop. 

We also returned a throw rug that we borrowed from a friend.

What came in - 1 0 items

My ex dropped by and showed us two coffee bean sacks he was given by a friend. He said he got one for us. We had a few wines and so we didn't question it at the time. The next morning I woke up aware that this sack was NOT true for us to have and no sooner had it arrived, would it be walked out the door.

I called Steve (ex) and asked him to grab it next time he drops by. He said "yeah, I thought it was odd that you took it given your current blog on consumerism".

What we wasted

I feel sick as I write this, but I have to share the truth... here are the foods I had to throw out.

5 bananas, 2 servings of homemade lasagne, 2 lemons, salad, 2 half onions, 1 bread roll, 2 strawberries, a dozen blueberries, 6 baby cucumbers, 2 half bags of spinach and rocket, and 2 bags of carrots (from my juice fast in November).

I am going to find a way to ensure we eat everything we buy...keep ya posted!

Insights

(1) I need to let our family and friends know that we prefer no more 'stuff' for gifts. This will be interesting as my mum loves to buy us 'stuff'. No trip to her place has us leave empty handed. I'm scared. 

(2) I have been totally disconnected from MY responsibilities in regards to eating the food we buy. I have a new sense of connection to the gifts of food in our fridge. 

TOTAL: OUT - 44   IN - 0